You know when you put on an outfit and it's everything and more than what you expected it to be? That's exactly how I felt when I styled this dress. It gave me all type of vintage womanly vibes - I love it.
Anywho, I know a main topic of mine on posts have been the pressures and anxieties of, well, adult hood and how I'm dealing (and not dealing) with them. Hey, it's been on my mind because that's where I am in life! With that, do you ever just look up and say, "How the Hell did I get this grown?". That's been my legit mood for the past perhaps...year lol. So, just to say it so I can accept it and move forward with my life, because we all know the first step to healing is acceptance (is there not an AA for those who can't accept adult hood?) - but...here it is...I'm turning 30! When I tell you it has been pulling my card - it has been sending your girl on a run for her money. Why? Well, like a lot of us, when I was a kid - or hell even 21 - I envisioned what my life would be like at this age. How much money I would have, where and how I would be living - ALLADAT. The fact that I do not have what I expected has put me in a full on depression session. I'm an actress and I wrote down about three years ago that I would be the Pink Power Ranger (no lie lol, and I really do want to star in a Block Buster movie someday soon (it will happen I claim it!)) in Power Rangers and to see the movie being released with no sights of me anywhere close to the movie - let's just say wasn't a good feeling. Visions of how many followers I would have on social media, the number of visits to my site, the brand partnerships I would have, I mean - I. Had. It. Laid. What's more important is how I've been taking all of this in. Sad to say, I have been ungrateful, comparative, and an all over spoiled brat about not having my way by 30. Which, overall, is no way to approach life nor get the best out of your life. So, with each day I am making a full on effort to be grateful about something and to just fucking chill about where I am right now. Because, if I'm here, God has a reason for it. I'll step off the soap box for now (remember I'm trying this whole vulnerability thing) and will take on my last days of 29 with grace and maybe do something crazy to bid a good farewell to my 20's. What I can say is that it was one hell of a ride!